Why Dean Brownlie should be playing (not Corey Anderson)

New Zealand have ended the first day of their two match Test series in Bangladesh on a thoroughly respectable score of 280-5. A good 73 by old ‘two meter Peter’ Fulton, and yet another Test century for Kane Williamson, the batsman most likely to stimulate an unexpected (though not entirely unwanted), spontaneous orgasm; well, alongside Moeen Ali of course…

Anyway, things are fairly even in that match it seems, the late Bangladeshi breakthroughs put a bit of a gloss over their performance in the field, but we shall see how it all turns out.

What did happen though, was the New Zealand selectors replaced Dean Brownlie with the young all-rounder Corey Anderson. Now I don’t know too much about Corey Anderson (from the few times I’ve seen him, he looked fairly: ‘limited-overs specialist’), but I do happen to harbour a relatively individual love for Mr Dean Brownlie, so here is a short list of reasons why I believe he should have been selected:

1) He’s from Perth, which has a cool aura about it, especially for a gritty middle-order Kiwi batsman. Very different, very hipster.

2) Being from Perth, he has this interesting compulsion to play everything off of the back-foot: but not in the expected, Mike Hussey kind of way; more in a misguided, I’m-not-sure-where-this-ball-is-pitching kind of way; he’d probably try to play the piano exclusively with his back-foot (not recommended). I could never conjure up the bravery to play forward (barring my expertly timed jaunts down the wicket of course…), thus I became something of an expert in the back-foot straight defense, nudge-type thing. The fact Dean Brownlie and I share some technical defeciencies is heartening.

3) He is really terrible at playing spin, so watching him play Bangladesh, in Bangladesh (a nation seemingly populated exclusively by left-arm slow bowlers) would have been – at the very least – entertaining.

4) He somehow manages to look like his team-mate James Franklin, and High School Musical’s Zac Efron at the same time. Google it. That’s impressive.

5) On a serious note: three of his four half-centuries, and his only century have come against South Africa and Australia, in South Africa and Australia. These were serious innings’ against very strong teams, these kind of performances aren’t flukes.

6) He is effectively a black haired Paul Collingwood, and everyone liked Paul Collingwood.

7) He has very nice GREEN eyes.

8) He has one of the most psychopathic-looking of Cricinfo profile pictures.

9) Dean is a better name than Corey. It isn’t a fantastic name, but come on: what the hell is ‘Corey’?

10) He’s an Australian playing for New Zealand. Very different. Very hipster.

Sure he only averages 29.62, but he’s worth a space obviously, at least until King Jesse returns.

(This article is intended to be light hearted. I really admire Brownlie as a player, and think he is a very good batsman. I also want to congratulate Corey Anderson on making his Test debut. Good luck to the both of them).

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One Response to Why Dean Brownlie should be playing (not Corey Anderson)

  1. Corey is a horrible, horrible name. Those late wickets for the Bangers put them in charge I reckon!

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